Be still.

Around this time last year, I went to a missions trip informational meeting and we discussed Psalm 46:10 where God says "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." I thought I understood that verse...

until this past weekend happened. 

I have been under the weather for the past few days, and not just your typical cough, flu etc. I mean yes, it could have been a whole lot worse but it was scarlet fever. Mine you, I've never been sick and out for 5 days in a row (even during my elementary schools days!) but man, I was this past week and it couldn't have come at a perfect time. I had tons of things I had planned out for this week but as of right now I haven't started my new job and I already graduated from school so technically my schedule was blank. Blank for the Lord to speak to me. ( I didn't realize that until now..) I was helpless, physically exhausted, drained and all I could really do was to lay still despite my controlling nature. 

As humans, we are wired to plan out our lives, to make our own decisions based on our reasoning and thinking, to do what feels right and then we end up being totally dissatisfied or we end up going down a deadly path of destruction. Sometimes in our spiritual life, I feel like we are always trying to control things without letting God be God and minister to us.  At least for me, I'm always trying to figure out the next step, trying to smart my way around God even in the smallest mundane tasks of everyday life. I'm always trying to be a "big girl", "independent" but in all reality, I have absolutely no idea what is best for me. 

So as I'm trying to scurry my way around and figure out big huge life decision plans, my sweet Dad wanted me to lay down, restore AND show me what I need to do next. And sure enough, He did.  He wanted to regain my trust, take away my doubts and strip me from my dirty ways to show me unfailing, undeniable, everlasting, overwhelming PEACE. 

And most importantly, I learned to let God be God. Knowing that He is Holy, everlasting, healer, omnipresent, creator and He holds my life in His hands. 
He knows what He's doing. I don't. 

So with that being said, I am thankful that the Holy Spirit redeemed me and showed up when I needed Him to. This is a testimony to His grace.